my 20s

what does ‘boss lady’ even mean?!

if i hear the term “boss lady” one more time, i’ll burst. like a straight up gusher.

i was finally able to pin down why that phrase was rattling me the other day: no one says how to be a boss lady. when i see it in an instagram caption or a friend mentions it in passing, i often laugh and agree. yeah, let’s be boss ladies.

but then recently, i just get annoyed. and i realized it was because every time i heard it, it was just a phrase. there was no action step, no friendly helpful ideas. i see every blogger, magazine and friend say it but i felt overwhelmed with how to do it.

since one of my pet peeves is when people complain about things they can fix, i’m going to try in my own way to help fix this problem and suggest 11 ways to be a kind, smart, gracious lady.:)

  1. stop gossiping. we need to build each other UP not break down. speak kindly, act kindly.
  2. bring a new mom a meal and offer to do something small for her – run an errand, vacuum, load the dishwasher, etc. let her know that you’re there for her. don’t know one? offer a new student, a new girl at work or the girl next to you in class a helping hand.
  3. mentor someone. this doesn’t have to be in a program – i have a couple of friends who are younger than me that i try to check in on every so often and offer a listening ear as they go through struggles that i might have already been through. being a big sister is such a thrill! #wishfulthinking
  4. clean out your closet and donate your excess clothes to a women’s shelter. i have found that it really helps me to physically drive to one and drop it off. i try to know that i am fortunate but it’s easy to feel like you have less in this race for more, more, more. when i go and help other women, it makes me feel part of something bigger and adjusts my perspective.
  5. do something sweet for your mom every week. maybe that’s making time for face timing, sending her a card or shooting her a quick “good morning” text every morning. we love to encourage young, new moms but what about our moms who are still new to it everyday? let’s love them fiercely.
  6. pay an honest compliment to one lady everyday. hopefully something different than “i like your shoes” and more along the lines of “your input in that meeting was impressive,” “your joy is contagious,” or “i hope you know how wonderful you are!”
  7. recommend an empowering book to a friend who is struggling with accepting herself. some of my favorites are rising strong, cold tangerines and present over perfect.
  8. pray for your enemies twice as much as for those you love.
  9. help a mom in the grocery store with her bags or an elderly woman with the door. let’s love women at all ages. <3
  10. send a strong female figure a letter thanking them. or better yet – call them. can you imagine how much it’d mean to them for you to thank them for the example they set? i mean praise freaking hands all around. plus a couple of dancing lady in the red dress emojis.
  11. buy one of these awesome key chains from my friend courtney – let’s make 2016 a great year. one that we follow our hearts.

and can i throw everyone for a twist and say that maybe we could show the supportive, strong men in our life some love as well? let’s build a longer table, not a higher fence and thank them for being good examples of gentlemen, of feminists, of kind people who love us right where we are. i wouldn’t want my life without some of the men in it and i am sure many of you could say the same.:)

now i can say go be a kind, bold, courageous boss lady — because now we all have an idea how! i still feel so happy to have started this little blog and have a circle of gal pals who support this creative venture of mine. 🙂

do you have ideas for how to be a boss lady? tricks up your sleeve? i’d so love to hear them!




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